Part of my role as mediator is interpretor. One of the hidden complexities of communication is that we hear through the filters of our past. When a marriage or other intimate relationship breaks down, the filters of the pain endured over the previous months or years add additional meaning to every word. My role then is to carefully listen both to the words and intent of each person speaking and to discern whether the other party is truly discerning what is being conveyed.
On many occasions I’ve repeated back to someone what I understood them to say, and he/she wil confirm that I heard and understood correctly…yet the other person in the dispute will insist that’s not what they heard. I then, gently and respectfully, begin the process of translating…helping the broken communication to be healed so resolution can happen. This becomes particularly important where children are involved. Even though the parents are parting ways, a new partnership must be created and maintained so that the children’s ongoing needs can be met.
Mediation has many benefits, saving thousands of dollars in legal fees and providing faster access to justice, particularly for divorce with children in Albuquerque. eMail me at ABQMediator@gmail.com to see if mediation is the best path for you.
Kelly Vickers, JD
www.KellyVickers.com
http://www.masterpeacedisputessolutions.com
